I have a tendency to name inanimate objects, especially the ones I love. I have a Coach purse named Dolly and another named Coco. My first car was named Houdini and the second named Angel. And when I got engaged I named my diamond ring Opal.
I used to wear Opal all the time when younger and first married. But then I had my first child and wearing my rings became more of a nuisance as I cuddled my newborn, swaddled her, changed diapers, etc. Opal (and her band mate) went into a decorative box and that was pretty much that.
Today, for the first time in at least 4 years, I wore my rings. They felt familiar yet foreign, lightweight yet heavy. Within her princess cut stones, Opal carries each sacrifice, promise, and conscious choice of my marriage. And the work of marriage is not glamorous, y'all. It's the antithesis of all the Pepto-Bismal pink crud that gets marketed in February and all the musical crescendos as the movie credits roll. "Happily ever after" does not exist without a whole helluva lot of work.
A dear one commented on my rings today (I suppose they caught his eye) and another asked, "Why don't you wear your rings?"
"I'm married whether or not my rings are on," I replied.
And ain't that the truth.
A symbol on my finger is simply that - a symbol. Yes, Opal is beautiful but what's more glorious to me is that with or without her on, I am yoked - in union - by choice to a person I authentically admire, trust, and love.
"I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman." -Anais Nin
Marriage is more about the commitment than the traditions. You don't have to wear something that proves you're married because it's something you hold in your heart.
ReplyDeleteMy mom and I used to name our cars. Thanks for sharing Ms.Beltran!
ReplyDeleteWhat an awesome quote. This journal gives me unexplainable joy and hope.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. Ain't that the truth.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful!
ReplyDeleteThis is so amazing. I look forward to one day sharing the amount of mutual respect and love that you show towards your family. For lack of a better word, GOALS!
ReplyDeleteI strive for a bond with my spouse one day as strong as the one you have. This is "relationship goals" as they call it- not all the crap about guys buying girls expensive gifts and taking cute candid photos.
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely quote! Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteI noticed your rings today but I thought I had just never noticed them. They're very beautiful
ReplyDeleteI named my Pinto Lucy because everyone loves Lucy just like everyone loves Pintos. I noticed your rings too, gold with a beautiful diamond, I just didn't realize that they were new and uncommon, very pretty though
ReplyDeleteThis journal gives me hope that true unconditional love does exist in a time when I need a reminder the most. Thank you for being that role model 💜
ReplyDeleteso much love <3
ReplyDelete