I don't know why I am writing again when my body is screaming at me to Shut. It. Down. I've had a full day being me just like I'm sure you've had a full day being you. I'm sitting here with my wet hair wrapped in a towel wondering why it is that some of you don't make an effort to email me. It baffles me - like are you so conditioned to view me as other that an email would be too much? And then I get to thinking how much of an effort I have made with some of you and you literally walk by me with not even a "hello". I noticed that today - how many of you don't say hi or bye. I'm not hurt by that - more curious. And then I start to wonder about how you must trip out on the hundreds of relationships I have that don't include you. And what about the classmates who email me often and show their true colors all while safely cocooned behind a luminous screen? Mind boggling.
Marina Keegan's been on my mind and heavy on my heart, too. Her words are beautiful and they live on beyond her. How tragic it must have been for her mother to sift through debris - mangled metal and broken bits - to unearth her baby's laptop. Do you guys know the depth of a mother's love? I mean, really? How your child is your heart walking outside of your body? How your child was once a part of you - little feet kicking and hearts fluttering all within you as you walked, talked, slept? I cannot imagine the strength and courage it took for her mother Tracy to do what she did.
I suppose I'm just feeling the full moon (I am unusually attuned to her - another bit of the magic of my life). I suppose I'm just replaying different scenes from my day. I suppose I'm just wondering why I'm over here and you're over there.
Separated yet connected - 5 months into this relationship that's going to end in June. Will I break up with you in person? Will we promise to still be friends? We all know how that goes, don't we?
Love and light, my little amoebas.
xoxo
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